From Spring 2002
Credit for photos and captions, unless noted otherwise, given to period Chapter Historian.
Last updated November 16, 2008
"I think I've heard of Alissa. You guys are talking about Smooch's Alissa, right?" - Erica
"I knew a girl who thought that getting a breast reduction would make her look thinner. Now she looks like a fat girl with small boobs." - Olaf
"I'm farting everywhere! If someone had a heat sensor, they'd see lots of little red balls behind me." - Amanda McCreary
"You guys can't even sodomize me properly." - Pledge Mike, blindfolded in the back of Crispy's car on the way to the pledge raid, after we made a wrong turn
"It would be terrible to date a smoker. There would always be smoke, going into your lungs! And it wouldn't even be marijuana!" - Michele
"Smooch's sheep was all about being petted, but she wouldn't eat his carrot." - Stephanie
"I swear, my breasts weigh more than that girl." - Emily
Butch: "How did you get into that class?"
Rachael Clark: "By giving the professor head, Butch! Lots and lots and lots of head!" (Butch is shocked)
Rachael: "I was just saying it before you got a chance."
Conclave Service Project Coordinator: "These are going to a youth prevention center!" Smooch: "Meaning .... they prevent youth?"
"OH MY GOD, IT'S MR. WIZARD!!!" - Judy, in the middle of an otherwise somber re-dedication ceremony
"Of course I remember you. Only twice in the history of this bar have we not been able to close because there was somebody puking in the bathroom." - Charlie's manager, to Rachel White
"I wish I was older. Do you ... like jazz?" - Elderly janitor at Conclave, macking on Stephanie
"I'm not so sure I like this." - Mother at the Livestock Classic, after a calf shoved its head into her son's crotch
"I've got wood! Does anyone have sheep?" - Said repeatedly throughout the semester at 18 Sunrise Ave.